Confucius remarked, "When a man’s father is living the son should have regard to what his father would have him do; when the father is dead, to what his father has done. A son who for three years after his father’s death does not in his own life change his father’s principles, may be said to be a good son."

The Master said, "Observe what a man has in mind to do when his father is living, and then observe what he does when his father is dead. If, for three years, he makes no changes to his father’s ways, he can be said to be a good son."

The Master said, "While a man’s father is alive, you can only see his intentions; it is when his father dies that you discover whether or not he is capable of carrying them out. If for the whole three years of mourning he manages to carry on the household exactly as in his father’s day, then he is a good son indeed."

The Master said: "While a person’s father is still alive, observe what he intends; when his father dies, observe what he does. A person who for three years refrains from reforming the ways (dao 道) of his late father can be called a filial son (xiao 孝)."

Chee says, the father being alive, observe the desire of the son; the father being dead, observe his conduct: if in three years there be no deviation from his father’s way, he may be termed a dutiful son.